Clare Josa | Author And Keynote Speaker
UK's Foremost Imposter Syndrome Expert, International Keynote Speaker & 8x Author
It’s something I regularly hear from friends and mentoring clients alike: “But I can’t do anything about that. It’s just my karma!”
And there was a time when I’d have said the same about the things I was going through.
But not any more.
The more I work with Law of Attraction and the more I understand how creating your reality really works, the more I understand that… [Read more…] about Are You Using Karma As An Excuse?
Is your car spick and span, gleaming its way along the road, recently polished with everything tidily arranged and within easy reach?
Or is it like mine can be – several months past needing its last wash, two-toned with mud and a mass of kids’ snack crumbs, discarded odd socks (the kids again, honest) and random pieces of mail strewn across the footwells?
And why should you care?
All of us have a messy car from time to time, but did you know it tells the world more about you than you might realise?
The way we look after our car is a mirror to how we are feeling
A mind that is calm and happy will create an environment very different to one that is stressed and overwhelmed.
For most of us, this shows as clutter on the passenger seat and the need for an overdue wash and wax. It’s all too easy to get into a cycle of neglect.
But things can reach extremes
I had a situation a few months ago where I was trying to do too much with too little time or support. Sure enough, it showed in my car. She (yes, she) was covered in mud from the winter weather, her interior was full of junk and, quite frankly, had I been asked to give anyone a lift, I’d have felt mortified.
It came to a head one lunchtime when I was picking my son up from Kindergarten. I had passed the fuel station, seeing my fuel light on, thinking “it’s only another 10 back to home – I’ll be fine.” Sure enough, on the return trip, I was going up a steep hill and ran out of fuel, grinding to a complete halt on a high speed road. The police had to come to push the car to safety, while I skulked my way to the petrol station to buy an emergency fuel cannister. Now that was mortifying.
But what did it say about me? The message was clear. I wasn’t looking after myself and I was running on empty. Literally.
The quote “as within, so without” comes from ancient wisdom and one of its meanings is that our internal world is reflected in our external reality.
So if we’re looking after something personal, such as our car, keeping it clean, tidy and well-serviced, then we’re probably doing the same to ourselves. Neglecting our car shows we’re likely to be neglecting ourselves. And the same goes for our home, our office or even our appearance. It shows that, at some deeper level, we don’t care.
What can you do?
The biggest step towards turning things around is to be aware of the problem. If you’re neglecting yourself, it will show in your surroundings.
Human nature means we often find it difficult to nurture ourselves. The great news is that “as within, so without” works both ways.
So if you want to turn things around, start by looking after your car – or your bedroom or wherever you’re neglecting on the inside. Turning this into a new routine will produce the side-effect that your “as within” will change, too. You’ll automatically start taking care of your body, your emotions and your mind, which will help you feel more positive.
Results can be fast.
It’s not about suddenly adding a weekly car clean and wax to your “to do” list. It’s much easier than that. Simply keeping your home free of clutter and finishing off the little jobs you start will give your unconscious mind the clear message that things are changing – for the better.
And once you’re into the habit of looking after your outside world, you might be surprised how quickly you think of ways to look after the “inside” you.
Remember: your inner and outer worlds are reflections of each other. You only need to make changes in one of them to impact them both.
And if you’d like some quick fixes, there are some great, easy techniques you can apply right now, to start feeling happier and less stressed in under 5 minutes.
Claim your copy of “5 Secrets To Feeling Happier Now” by going to http://www.howtofeelhappier.com and registering for our monthly “Inspirations” ezine. You’ll find the boxes in the top right hand corner.
Those who know me know all too well how much I adore coffee.
I have been known to make a 20 mile detour in the middle of a mountain-trekking holiday, to get to the nearest coffee shop for a fix…
And even though I love camping, I never go without the ability to make fresh coffee for breakfast – no matter how small the tent or how rural the campsite 😉
I’m also famous for my regular attempts to give up coffee. I tend to do pretty well for the first week or two – making it through the detox stage and beyond, but then willpower fails me and I’m back on 4 mugs a day of freshly ground coffee…
Aside: Want to know – How long does it take to break a habit?
Why would I give up something I love?
Because I’d like to kick the habit. I’d like to get back to enjoying a coffee every now and then, whenever I choose, rather than it being a permanent feature of my mornings.
Also I would drink more water, which would be good for me.
Plus caffeine is a drug and isn’t great for your system.
So there are lots of reasons to give up – at least for a while!
Anyway, I’ve decided to use the excuse of Lent as a reason to give up coffee for the next 6 weeks. And I’ll be keeping a mood diary, to test out the hypothesis that giving up coffee makes you happier – watch the blog for updates!
Why am I going to succeed this time, where previous attempts have exposed my shocking lack of willpower?
Because this time I’m giving myself the added incentive of raising money for my favourite charity, Action Against Hunger, and their End Child Hunger Campaign.
I know we’re in the middle of a credit crunch and times are tight… But how often do we spend money on a latte or cappuccino, with scarcely a thought?
Perhaps you might consider giving up your coffee today and making a donation to Action Against Hunger, instead?
Either way, thank you for your support and watch this space for regular reports from coffee-free-Clare!
Wishing you smiles and sunshine,
Love,
Clare x
P.S. If you’d like to join in and give up coffee for a while – or even get sponsored for it – how about signing up in the Giving Up Coffee discussion on our Facebook fan page?
P.P.S. I’d love to hear your thoughts, tips and ideas via the comments box below!
Do you think you don’t have time to relax?
I know what you mean.
Life is so hectic, with stress flying in all directions, that the thought of taking 10 or 20 minutes out to relax seems like madness.
Yet it’s a proven fact that:
A relaxed mind is a creative mind.
So if you’ve got a to-do list as long as your arm, perhaps the best thing you could do would be to start off with 20 minutes of deep relaxation.
It might seem strange, but spending that 20 minutes will actually buy you more time.
Most of us are so used to passing comment about everything and everyone around us that we don’t even notice we’re doing it.
And if we were to notice, we’d probably just laugh it off, with a slightly guilty conscience.
Find out why it’s a seriously risky business.
Yet passing judgment on others gives our unconscious mind a dangerously negative message.
It’s a fact of life: most of us are walking round passing judgement and commenting on the world around us.
Even reading newspaper or magazine that’s judging celebrities, for example, is giving our unconscious mind the message that you have to look or behave in a certain way, in order to be accepted.
Whether it’s commenting on someone else’s clothes or the state of the cafe where we grab a coffee, we’re passing judgement and it’s usually not pretty…
It’s partly a cultural thing and partly a product of our upbringing that gives us this habit. And some of us have it worse than others.
There are two major risks with running this one:
The thing is that our unconscious mind doesn’t pay attention to whether we’re talking about the person in the street or ourselves. It just pays attention to the emotions behind the message.
So it quickly learns that being accepted or loved is dependent on us being a projection of who we think others want us to be – whether that’s accurate or not.
Yet have you ever noticed people who are genuinely “happy in their own skin” are those who attract friends like a magnet? They radiate a confidence and a level of self-acceptance that makes it easy to be around them. It’s as though they are so happy with who they are, so able to see the positive aspects, that they act as a mirror to us of those qualities in ourselves.
So believing we have to be someone who we aren’t, in order to be liked, is a recipe for disaster.
Yet being who we truly are can be one of the greatest challenges we’ll ever face.
And it’s a life-long journey, peeling away the layers of the onion, releasing the limiting beliefs that are holding us back, each time discovering anew who we truly are – and how amazing that person is.
And one of the simplest steps towards that goal is to let go of judging others – and ourselves.
Turning down the volume on our inner critic; letting go of the need to find fault; looking for the good in people, places and situations, rather than having an eagle eye for their mistakes.
And taking this one thought at a time is the easiest way to start.
Playing with this for even just 3 days and it could literally change your life.
Want to give it a try?
Positive Thinking: discover why it’s not all about being Pollyanna and pretending everything is ok. Find out why High-Impact Positive Thinking can change your life – fast.
Positive thinking gets bad press.
For most of us it conjures up Pollyanna-style nightmares of saccharine-sweet, well-meaning people, grinning wildly, just inches from your face, telling you that “everything will be fine”, in the middle of a life crisis.
But positive thinking isn’t about pretending that everything is alright. It’s not about telling ourselves lies. It’s not about ignoring what’s going on around us.
Positive Thinking is about understanding that whatever we’re thinking about creates the filter through which we see the world.
So rose-tinted glasses make it easier to spot the good things around us, no matter what’s going on. Whilst black storm cloud glasses mean doom and gloom pervades.
And there’s another catch…
Ever noticed how, if your day starts badly, it goes downhill fast? But if your day starts well, with sunshine and smiles, it generally goes well? That’s because…
We get what we think about.
It’s as though we literally attract experiences that match whatever is on our mind. So if we expect something to go badly or someone to be rude to us, chances are that’s what we’ll experience. But if we expect things to go well and keep our thought patterns running positively, we’ll have a much better day.
So positive thinking seems to be a good idea?
It’s all very well being told that we need to think positive things, but if most of us were to monitor our thoughts for just an hour, we’d probably be shocked at how many of them are grumpy or negative. So how do we make the shift to thinking more positively?
That’s what “High-Impact Positive Thinking” is all about.
It’s a set of strategies and tools that help you make the shift from wherever you are right now to thinking more positively, feeling happier and enjoying life more – whatever is going on around you.
I’ll be writing more about High-Impact Positive Thinking over the coming weeks and months. So if you want to make sure you catch the articles, videos and podcasts on the topic, make sure you’re getting our regular newsletter by signing up in the top right hand corner of the How To Feel Happier home page!
Thanks,
Founder, How To Feel Happier
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